Boozeblogger
9Nov/102

One Last Drink…

This was originally posted as a guest blog on www.whatdoesjohnknow.com back in early september. Though it's been password protected I noticed that a number of people have been trying to view it because it keeps showing up on the random post feed above. I'm not sure of the "netiquette" of reposting something you wrote for another persons blog...but I'm just going to risk it. Enjoy and leave me some damn comments.

Christopher Hitchens is dying. Whether you love him or hate him the man is now faced with a fate we will all meet by a method of departure most of us hope to avoid. He's been diagnosed with late-stage esophageal cancer and if he's very, very lucky he might make it another few years. People die every day and while there may be better men to mourn there might be no better man to answer the question concerning libations and departures we pose to you today.

These are Hitchens' 10 Commandments for Drinking from his recently released memoir: Hitch 22

1.Don’t drink on an empty stomach: the main point of the refreshment is the enhancement of food.
2.Don’t drink if you have the blues: it’s a junk cure.
3.Drink when you are in a good mood.
4.Cheap booze is a false economy.
5.It’s not true that you shouldn’t drink alone: these can be the happiest glasses you ever drain.
6.Hangovers are anothter bad sign, and you should not expect to be believed if you take refuge in saying you can’t properly remember last night. (If you really don’t remember, that’s an even worse sign.)
7.Avoid all narcotics: these make you more boring rather than less and are not designed—as are the grape and the grain—to enliven company.
8.Be careful about up-grading too far to single malt Scotch: when you are voyaging in rough countries it won’t be easily available.
9.Never even think about driving a car if you have taken a drop.

10.It’s much worse to see a woman drunk than a man: I don’t know quite why this is true but it just is. Don’t ever be responsible for it.

So here's the question. Imagine you are told the date and time of your death and, in that final hour, given access to one last dram of any whisk(e)y in existence or out of existence. One final drink before you shove off into the darkness. Would you choose the most expensive in the world? Maybe the oldest you can think of? Maybe that one that you never could find. Maybe the same one your father or grandfather drank, the scent of which you still remember wistfully when you think of Him. Would it be your old standard or a new favorite? Would you break into the Buffalo Trace distillery and crack open a barrel knowing that they'll NEVER TAKE YOU ALIVE?! I might. Either way let us know your thoughts in the comments. And make it a good one; it's your last.

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  1. Erik Nabler
    November 9th, 2010 - 19:14

    Wooh, thought you were dead.

    Anyway, my last drink would be Woodford Reserve Masters Collection 1838 Sweetmash Bourbon. Best bourbon I have ever had.

    Sipped gently from Megan Fox’s belly button – oh noes, some has dribbled down….Can’t let that go to waste! It’s my last drink, for God’s sake!

  2. ryan
    November 10th, 2010 - 11:05

    Not even as your last meal from death row. MAYBE if you’re Michael Bay.


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